notes from the mommyhood - in dedication to all the mothers who have lost.....

more than a few loved ones in my life have experienced a loss in the last few months. i want to dedicate this post to all the mothers out there who have lost a young child - may your angels all be with you in spirit, in your smile and in the twinkle in your eyes. my thoughts and hugs are with you.

jewel - the shape of you
this song has special meaning to a close friend of mine and i think it sums up this post perfectly.

"September settled softly
Leaves are starting to fall
I recall, last time you were here
Your laughter a melody that lingers still

There's a hole in my heart And I carry it wherever I go
Like a treasure that travels with me down every road
There's this longing lonesome and deep
Kind of bitter, kind of sweet
There's a hole in my heart in the shape of you

Time stealing swiftly
There's children having children of their own
And around life's merry-go round goes
And there you are wanting what you cannot hold

There's a hole in my heart
And I carry it wherever I go
Like a treasure that travels with me down every road
There's this longing lonesome and deep
Kind of bitter, kind of sweet
There's a hole in my heart in the shape of you

Even though my heart aches There's a smile on my face
Just like a window to heaven
There's a light shining through
This hole in my heart so I carry it wherever I go
Like a treasure that travels with me down every road
There's this longing lonesome and deep
Kind of bitter, kind of sweet
There's a hole in my heart
There's a hole in my heart
There's a hole in my heart in the shape of you"

not often enough are mothers able to speak openly about the pain and loss of a miscarriage, the hurt, and emotional turmoil you suffer. nor are we able to talk without the worry of judgement when your child is lost due to medical reasons, during birth or in the womb. there is grief, sadness and emptiness for all of these types of loss. as a friend to people who have experienced all of these, it saddens me to see the lack of support in our communities, online and within our everyday lives with families and friends.

so for all of you out there with a "hole in your hearts", come share. for all of you trying to show love and support to someone in your life who has lost someone, come share too. maybe together we can take one tiny step in helping each other not feel alone during this time.

maybe it should be illegal for gisele to have "potty of the mouth syndrome"

image source

some of you may have heard the recent outlandish comments made by super model gisele bundchen stating that she thinks formula feeding should be against the law and you will totally understand the need for my rant today. if you haven't heard here's a snippet of some her ridiculous statements showing how badly she is suffering from "potty of the mouth syndrome":

"The 30-year-old told the UK Harper's Bazaar magazine: "I think breastfeeding really helped (me keep my figure). Some people here (in the US) think they don't have to breastfeed, and I think 'Are you going to give chemical food to your child when they are so little?' I think there should be a worldwide law, in my opinion, that mothers should breastfeed their babies for six months."

also:

"She said meditating every day prepared her for giving birth, telling Harper's Bazaar: "It prepared me mentally and physically. It's called 'labour' not 'holiday' for a reason, and I knew that. You want to go into the most intense physical experience of your life unprepared? That doesn't make any sense to me. Then I was ready and I thought OK, let's get to work'. I wasn't expecting someone else to get the baby out of me."

(i've discussed (ranted about) this pic before...read it here)

gisele has also been quoted as stating "that her labor was entirely painless" and that she "did kung fu up until two weeks before Benjamin was born, and yoga three days a week. I think a lot of people get pregnant and decide they can turn into garbage disposals". she also claims that her son was potty trained at 6 months of age. good for you gisele, we're so happy for you....not. what does she want - a freakin' medal?

i personally don't give a rat's ass that she meditated through her "painless birth" and that she thinks us regular women are "garbage disposals" for gaining a normal amount of weight during our pregnancies....um...gisele....that's what happens when you eat like a normal, healthy pregnant women should! god knows what your son lived on as a fetus - carrot sticks and water? oh, and i guess i'm also a lazy mother because i had to have a c-section and have someone else get my baby out of me?

as for her over the top statement that it should be illegal for women not to breastfeed their children i seriously think she is either a) off her rocker or b) very hormonal. what's she gonna do - suggest we put women in jail and separate them from their newborns for a medical condition? or fine them in this economy? wtf! now don't get me wrong, i'm a big time advocate for breastfeeding our children, but some women just can't, bottom line. that doesn't mean they should be punished or ostracized. as mothers we do that enough to ourselves. did she ever think of the woman's feelings who can't breastfeed even though she may long too? or the mother who adopts a child and can't breastfeed them? c'mon.

after the interview spread around like wildfire she has now issued a statement trying to talk her way out of the giant shi&tstorm she has roused. if you care to hear more nonsense from her click here to read it.

what are your thoughts? my hubby couldn't stand to listen to me rant on this subject any longer so i'm turning to you ladies. let's have a conversation, join me in my ranting...haha. am i hormonal myself to be so angered by her statements?

via The Press Association
via Vogue
Via Babycenter

**(Added this morning) Ok ladies, let's get one thing straight first. This post was not put up for us to argue with each other. It has nothing to do with breastfeeding/vs formula feeding and who is right and wrong, I posted it to say how nuts I think Gisele is for saying that it should be ILLEGAL to not breastfeed.

Secondly, I am a huge advocate of breastfeeding and believe that if you can you should. I put up this rant because I simply think that it is ignorant to think that it should be ILLEGAL to not do it.

As for the media, well this blog is sort of a form of social media. This blog helps me to deal with being a mom and gives moms a place to voice all the ups and down of motherhood and unfortunately seeing and hearing media about other famous moms is something that is very hard to escape nowadays.

Could we just ignore it - yes. Would it still upset us - yes. Would we bottle it up - yes. Who needs more bottled up emotions when you are a mother? We're hard enough on ourselves. I was very upset and hurt when I read her comments and felt that I just had to say my piece. It touched a sore spot for me. Maybe I shouldn't have been, but I am one of those mothers who needed help with both of my births and who know a few ladies who wanted desperately to breastfeed and couldn't. When a woman hears those kinds of statements from another mom it hurts, no matter who she is or where she hears it.

notes from the mommyhood - it's bad enough that half our body is already swollen...

image "on the peak"

looks like one of those dreadful pregnancy side effect has finally hit me. i managed to escape it during my 1st pregnancy, but i haven't been so lucky this time around. yep, you guessed it, the dreaded swollen ankles/legs have hit. yuck! ewwww! owww! and ok, f*&#K! that pretty much sums it up in my book.

c'mon guys, seriously, with all the things pregnant women have to deal with is this really necessary? mine swelled up for the first time around new year's eve. we had friends staying with us and i must admit, i overdid it with the wii playing. yes, i played wii pregnant. i actually did more than play, i took on the fitness age test. i wanted to see how old that thing was going to peg me at when i am wobbling around huge like a whale. damn am i proud to admit that i was 34 - this was wonderful to me since i am only 32. two years extra wasn't bad in my book and i beat all the men at baseball - go home runs! i was so proud of myself, i was whooping around the house prancing like a proud peacock when my legs started to feel funny. i looked down and low and behold, there was the ghastly sight! bah! what a way to ruin my moment!

ahhhh, i remember the days of slender ankles....

i wasn't allowed to play anymore wii after that and had to spend a day or two with my feet up and let me tell you, sleeping like that sucks bad! it finally eased up and went away, but it does return now and again, especially if i am trying to exercise. so now i have to take it easy and probably end up buying ugly shoes to squeeze my swollen toes into. it's bad enough i can't find a half decent maternity swimsuit to wear never mind a cute pair of jeans! pregnancy is getting more stylish, but it's definitely not getting more affordable. not all of us can swing for a pair of pricey "seven's" to wear during our maternity, especially when it's your 2nd baby and you know you sure ain't having anymore.

but enough about my rants on maternity clothes, i could go on about that for a solid week's worth of posts. and before you all start sending me links remember i live in canada and places like the gap and old navy and boo hoo, target won't ship to canada. it breaks my heart. i have to scour ebay to get my hands on those products. so if you know of a great maternity shop online that ships international without charging me an arm and a leg - i'm in!

keep those feet up ladies!

back to the topic on hand, i have been doing the required remedies for my swollen gams:

- drink tons and tons of water
- keep feet elevated
- don't cross your legs
- don't wear tight shoes
- avoid salty foods
- don't sit for too long
- sleep on your left side
- hope your hubby isn't like mine and will actually rub your feet for you
- and exercise.

are there any i'm missing? any tips from real moms instead of some snooty maternity book author? i sure could use a few extra. there should be a support group for us swollen mommies so we can beatch to our heart's content about how our once normal skinned bodies have now turned into stretched out, swollen, aching, and poofy ones. yes it's for a wonderful cause and yes, it's definitely worth it in the end but does that really mean we can't complain about it a little? we are supposed to feel gorgeous and glowing at this point aren't we? i feel a bit irritated i must say. i want to find giselle walking down some city street prancing her tiny preggo body, with no swelling, perfect clothes and her friggin flying lessons and pump her up full with a water hose - eat some meat lady!

what is she - like 9 months here? i was this big at 9 weeks...but then...i'm not a model...i eat.

image: splash

are you all swelled up like a giant watermelon? comment below and let's console each other and tell ourselves how gorgeous our gams still look even though they sure are poofier!

(p.s. - if you are going to tell me to rush to a doctor, don't worry, i see mine in a few days.)

notes from the mommyhood - 5 ways to help parent when you aren't at your best

all of us struggle with sick days, tired days, i don't feel like being a mom days, and i need a shower and a lot more sleep days, but what about those who suffer from the i have an illness to deal with days? how do we survive and be a good parent on those days when we aren't at our best? sheer willpower, inner strength and a little thing called "a mother's love" - it's strong, powerful and always pulls you through.

any mom out there dealing with a chronic illness is sure to feel overpowered, exhausted, and just plain want to give up and stay in bed. that's a good idea if you are seriously ill, but if you are just going through your normal everyday side effects, staying in bed all day isn't always an option. where do we turn to in this case? how do we get by?

i find myself drawing on the fact that i have made it this far. i suffer from a bad case of endometriosis, (click on the word if you want to know more about endometriosis and it's symptoms), and i have survived a ruptured ovarian cyst, 3 surgeries and live minus 1 ovary & 1 fallopian tube. i hate the word endometriosis and i hate the disease, but i don't allow myself to spread the hate farther than that. i have dealt with my anger and sadness over this illness and luckily beat the "why am i the one who has to have this" blues.

{image: ashleyrose}

a few years ago, after suffering from endometriosis for quite some time, i was almost at the point of getting a hysterectomy and moving on with my life in a more healthier way when the need for a child of my own outweighed my desire to be healthy and pain free. i decided to try my last resort (which at the time seemed like going to see theweebeejeebee witch doctor), and went to see a naturopathic physician. i have never looked back. 3 years later i have a gorgeous 2 year old daughter (when nobody thought i would have one) , no more horomone pills and painkillers, a disease that is mostly under control (when my specialist had run out of options) and a fresh outlook on alternative medicine. what i don't have though, is the magic ability to make those hard days disappear - and yes, they still exist, but i do have a few steps that have sure made them a lot easier for me to deal with.

{image: hien_it}

1) surround yourself with a great support group of family and friends. they may not always be able to come by and watch your child for you, but a quick phone call to boost your spirits or take your mind of your illness can never hurt. make sure your spouse/partner & family understands the full realms of your illness. too often women are embarrassed by their sickness and don't fully explain what we are dealing with to our loved ones. they can't help us if they don't know we are even suffering.

{image:p-j-trash}

2) make time to truly enjoy when you are feeling good no matter how small it is. savour those days or moments and take it in, memorize it. use that memory the next time you are feeling ill, weak, or in pain and make it your happy place. a strong, vivid, and cheerful memory can help relax your body and allow you to pull through it even when your little one is having a cranky, no nap day.

3) get rest. rest whenever you can. ya right you say? well, whether that means sitting and playing with the kids instead of running around or leaving the chores till another day, just do what you can to take it easy. nap when your child naps (if they nap that is). i have a hard time with this one, but eventually my body will give out and i will crash during naptime. that's the key though, listen to your body, if you need that nap, your body will go along with you. you may not be able to go to bed and sleep all day but you can allow your body to rest up in small ways throughout the day and rest is rest when it comes down to it.

{image: gifrancis}

4) make your life simpler. try to alleviate any unnecessary stress. stress plays havoc with our hormones and our emotional/mental wellness. simplify your home, your chores and your extracurricular activities. learn to say no to things/people when you just can't do it and don't feel guilty for your illness or your actions - you are just making yourself and your children a priority.

try to organize your home in a way that there isn't a lot of clutter to see/clean and chores are on a easy schedule during the week for you to handle (i need to do more of this). i truly do believe in the power of the beauty in simplicity. the less exterior stress in our lives we have the easier it is to deal with the more pertinent issues we have and leaves more time for happier activities with our kids and for getting well.

{image: jasmic}

5) banish the guilt. seriously, don't let that pester. it will make you feel worse - always. stick a note on your fridge or somewhere you will see often of something inspirational that will lift your spirits or give you strength to get through that moment. sometimes even a hug from your child can help. i find when i am feeling ill and run down a simple hug from my child makes a world of difference. they seem to know when we aren't feeling well and will either act up (little monsters they can be..haha) or in those wonderful little moments say exactly what you need to hear. a little tlc and an "i love you mama, it's ok" can magically make me feel that much better and give me the strength to get up and carry on that day. you aren't always going to have good days, there will be bad ones, but you can't control that, so there is no need for you to feel guilt for something you didn't do and cannot control.

overall, the most important thing i have come to realize is to truly love yourself. no matter what illness is affecting you, or even if it is a bad case of the flu, loving oneself is an important part of being a good parent and in allowing your body to heal. sometimes we are our bodies worst enemies. positive thinking and trying to live a happier existence can truly help give you the power to make it through the day with a smile on your face that isn't forced and who knows, you may even feel better too :)

{if anyone you know is suffering from endometriosis or you think you may be, please go to the the endometriosis association's website - you are not alone. there are wonderful support groups all over the world and a wealth of knowledge and research to be shared on this site. sometimes the best step is to educate yourself on you or your loved ones illnesses. with generous donations and time, hopefully, one day, this horrible disease that silently and painfully affects so many of us will have a cure.}

notes from the mommyhood - date night lowdown

{image: moriza}

one of the most important things that my hubby and i have instilled in our marriage since having mackenzie is date night. it sounds sad, i know, to book a date with your husband, but when you have busy schedules and little ones running around it's an important factor in keeping that relationship outside of your children alive.

we try to have date night once a month. it doesn't always work out as planned and we have had many adventures (good and bad) on our date nights, but we always find the time. date night doesn't have to be on the weekend or at night either. we try to work them in around my sister's schedule, who we are lucky enough to have watch mack for us, and we enjoy going out together, sans baby, no matter what the day or time. the important thing is we are out, alone, together, with NO BABY! find a time that works for you. once a week, twice a month, every second month, it doesn't matter, finding the time to spend together is what does.

{image: hamed parham}

if that sounds mean to some of you, i'm sorry. i am a stay at home mom and sometimes that date night is the only time out of the entire month, yes, the entire month that i get a few hours without my child. it would drive any sane mom to the brink. i need that time, as much as i love my daughter, to be me, not mommy for a few hours. to feel attractive and fun, and to have a decent adult conversation with the love of my life not about mack's bowels or sleep habits - as interesting as those can be.

we have a rule on our date nights. we don't talk about mackenzie. it's hard, trust me on that one. have you ever tried to go for a few hours without talking about your kids? it's pretty tricky and we don't always pull it off, but we try. she is, after all, a huge part of our lives, but so are my husband and i to each other. i find that sometimes it is about putting value on your relationship as a couple as well as being good parents. we become so encompassed by pleasing our children and trying to excel at being good moms and dads that we forget to be good husbands and wives alone as well. it takes work to make a marriage healthy and strong. the word work might turn you off, but that's what it is. we work at everything we do. staying healthy, happy, keeping our homes tidy, pleasing our children, our hobbies, our gardens, so why not our relationships with our partners?

{image: ferran}

just give it a shot, sit down and broach the subject with your loved one the next time you have 30 seconds before falling asleep exhausted and see what their reaction is. odds are they will be thrilled with the idea of not seeing you in your sweatpants and nagging about helping out around the house and about getting some time alone with you. find something you both enjoy doing and go do it. it doesn't have to be the typical date either, you don't have to go see a movie. our next date is to go play tennis and have a picnic at the beach. sound romantic to you? maybe not, but to us it's heaven.....and we will relish every precious minute of it.

do you have date night with your partner? what's your favorite date activity? we would love to hear about it! share your thoughts :)

{date night pic of me and the hubby}

notes from the mommyhood - made with love

we received a lovely, handmade, crocheted blanket as a gift last week from my nana and papa. my nana, and my mom and i, all have the same love of gorgeous ocean blues and turquoises that this blanket was crocheted with. it must have been fate that my nana bought this for me because i had been on the hunt for months for the perfect throw for our bed. i had been too lazy to crochet one myself and too cheap to buy one i didn't absolutely covet. this blanket fit all my criteria - it was handmade, it's warm, soft, cozy and the color and pattern are just right.

the best thing about this blanket is that it couldn't have come at a better time. my little girl and i are both sick (again - bah!) and we started out thinking we had a cough/cold but after quite the rigmarole at the doc today it seems we both have bronchitis - me worse than her. i have even lost my voice! anyone who knows me knows this is a very, very bad thing. if you think i talk a lot on here, you should hear me go in real life. i am now finding myself sounding like a weird breed of seal, or like that little penguin from happy feet when he tries to sing - it's just plain sad. just be thankful you all can't hear me wheeze. this blanket has helped me get through some long nights lately and has eased those cold chills from beneath my duvet. there's just something so healing about laying under a blanket made with love.

my folks have left to return home, leaving us in full tear mode with my little one asking "where's my family?" and me trying to explain that nana & opa live far away and have had to go back home. it sucks, and being far away from family you are very close too sucks as well. but that's how it goes sometimes. after these last 2 weeks i truly do believe it does take a family to raise a child. so mom/dad, if you're reading this "come back, we miss you already".

there won't be a fit friday in the mommyhood today as i am not fit enough to write one with my bronchitis ailing me. i try to keep things fresh around here and i couldn't bring myself to post something half assed just for the sake of posting.

if anyone out there is interested in being a guest blogger on fit fridays in the mommyhood or has a topic they would like to see on here, i would love to hear from you! send me an email at luvinthemommyhood@yahoo.ca and let me know what you're thinking. wishing you all a healthy and happy weekend surrounded by family and loved ones.

what's your favorite gift that you received that was made with love?

notes from the mommyhood - post traumatic shi* disorder

ok, this is a gross post, but funny, and disgusting and i couldn't help but share it. i need to know that i am not alone. we are starting to potty train, or what i am slowly learning should be called - hell. just when you think life may start to get a bit more normal, your child is talking, sleeping (a bit), has teeth and is eating normally, a slight euphoria hits you, i can handle this, it's gonna be ok, and then wham - enter the POTTY. i hate the potty. we have hardly started the potty training and i already hate the potty. i especially hate that stupid, unintelligent, ridiculously overplayed and over advertised "potty dance" commercial. what the fu*& is that? i'm sorry to go off on a tangent, but that dance is dumb. ok, i said it. moving on.
we started potty training, things have been going good, until the other day. we decided to go the route of letting mackenzie set her own pace. we didn't want to really force her too much, as she isn't even 2 yet. i wanted it to be a relaxing experience for her and she seems keen to learn. we do the training pants during the day and diapers when we go out and at night. i usually ask her in the morning if she would prefer diapers or training pants and she usually wants the training pants. well the other day, it was the diaper she wanted. i should have known.

so we put that diaper on. i was sick and having a very, very rough day and had been counting down the hours/minutes till my husband got home from work, which was late. i was laying on the couch in misery, when i spotted my angel daughter (ya right) out of the corner of my eye crouching in the corner. i then heard that rrrriiippping sound of the velcro coming off. just as i turned to stop her, flop, off came the diaper and out rolled a huge poop. now, not to be too graphic, some fell out of the diaper, and what did my angel baby do, picked it up. she looked at me and in slow motion i yelled "nooooooooo", she then decided it was gross, and stunk and wanted it off her hands. she started flicking that poo all over my light beige carpet. now, i had already thrown up everything in my tummy, thank goodness, or i would have barfed right then and there and the sight of her little legs and bum covered in poop, hands brown with it and my poor, rental carpet covered in it.

my question to you is, what the heck do you do in a situation like this? cry? barf? get drunk? i called my hubby and told him how much he owes me and asked him to bring me home a cookie. i think i was crazed. a cookie? don't ask me why, but in that situation the only thing that would make my disgust disappear was to eat something i hardly ever eat. and you know what, this situation happened a few days ago, and what did i bake today - cookies. i am still recovering. i think i have post traumatic shi* disorder.


any of you out there suffering? let's share our stories - i need to know i am not alone out here.

notes from the mommyhood - preschool paranoia

ok, seriously, if someone had told me when i was pregnant that there would be so much stress involved with daycare/preschool i would have been frightened to death, but much better equipped to handle things as my daughter grew from baby to toddler.

who knew the horrors that are involved in wait lists, paying to be on waitlists, who you know, who you don't know, what you don't know that goes on when you aren't there, will it damage your child for life or will it not, and the other trillion worst case scenarios that go through a parents mind when deciding on any type of care/education for their child.

my daughter isn't even 2 and we had to start hunting for preschools and getting on waitlists a month ago. what the fu** is that about? i want to enjoy my baby. i don't want to be constantly fretting over where she is going to go to preschool, what type of preschool (who knew there were so many kinds) and then to top it off the cost of preschool! yes, the cost. i think i must have been living on some other planet when i thought that preschool was affordable or by a donation of some sorts. well, it's not free and to our shock, we can't afford to put our daughter in the type of preschool we would want to. how is that fair?

now don't get me wrong, we live quite happily on my hubby's salary. we don't make a lot but we are creative with our budget and we get by. does that mean that my child or someone else's child, that isn't well off, receives a better type of education as a toddler? i guess so. the preschools we can afford are not bad, they just weren't the style of school we were after.

during my research on preschools i came across the wonderful global mama. if you are a parent struggling to figure out the differences between the many types of preschools available for your toddler, check out her ongoing series on "hunting for a preschool". laura has provided us with a resource written in a language that parents can understand to help take the cloud of confusion off some of the many questions parents may have about montessori/waldorf etc. each post in the series:

"will profile a different type of school, giving you key information about the background and philosophy, curriculum, strengths and critiques, a typical “day in the life”, as well as a list of further resources."

global mama hopes to help "demystify the process of choosing a preschool". you can find her links here:

hunting for a preschool, part 2: waldorf

hunting for a preschool, part 1: montessori

hunting for a preschool, introduction

a big thank you to laura, for her kindness, her link love, for providing such a helpful series and for helping me clarify the blurry world of preschools. we have now decided on the type of preschool that fits our families needs and also our budget.

are any of you suffering from the same bubble bursting feeling of preschool being a fun experience for a family? i am trying to stay optimistic, yes, it's hard to tell by this post, but i want my daughter to have a wonderful preschool experience free from all the worries us adults have to deal with. what ever happened to that kind of place? was i the only one who went to a preschool like that when i was younger? i'd love to hear your thoughts.

notes from the mommyhood - weaning your toddler

she's not a baby anymore. mackenzie is finally weaned. yep, no more boobie. she is a big girl now, proud of her accomplishment and excited to tell anyone who will listen that she has "no more boobie! i'm a big girl now!". i have to admit it was easier than i thought it was going to be.

for all you out there thinking about weaning or just starting the process here are some tips i found helpful. not all of you will agree with me, but hey, when i went looking online for weaning info all i found was the same old boring mumbo jumbo that i couldn't even fathom reading:

- follow your child's lead. don't rush things, but do start the process if you are feeling ready to be done breastfeeding even if your child is still content to be on the boob. i found myself frustrated and impatient with breastfeeding the last few months and mackenzie was also restless and ill at ease while on the boob. i knew it was time for me to start weaning her regardless of if she still wanted booby or not.

- keep in mind the age of your child. every child is different when it comes to weaning and every mother is different when it comes to the hows and whys of weaning. mackenzie is 2 next month and for us, as a family, we felt she was ready to wean. for others this may not be the right age or they were ready to wean at 6 months. the answers are not cut in stone so don't be hard on yourself. whatever is best for you as a family, is what is best for your child.

- they are going to scream and cry. be prepared if you are weaning a sharp witted toddler - they are going to try every trick in the book to get you to slip them the boob. don't crack under the pressure, don't give in when they set those big, weepy eyes on you crying for booby, it's not worth it. you will only confuse your child more with the back and forth of booby/no booby. stick to your guns just like with all other training. it will make the whole transition a lot easier.

- wean slowly or go cold turkey. there are a lot of tips for either side of the fence. we started out trying the wean slowly process and it just wasn't working. instead we went cold turkey. this worked for us because we had already weaned mackenzie off of bedtime and middle of the night feedings a long, long time ago. she was only feeding in the morning and at nap time. she found it confusing to have boob in the morning and not at nap time, so we just removed both. if you are still doing multiple feedings it may be less traumatic to wean slowly, which is the norm.


- substitute the boob with your love. i miss the cuddling with my baby but new things have replaced that. now when my daughter wants me it's not for food it's for pure love and affection. she now reaches for me and says "i luv you mommy" and hugs me instead of grabbing at my shirt and whipping my breast out saying "booby mommy! booby!".

- distraction works wonders. this isn't a new thing. when you have a cranky or pissy toddler the art of distraction works wonders. mackenzie used to have a long feed in the morning after breakfast while i enjoyed a little regis and my morning cup of coffee, but now we have an endless amount of storybook reading and outings to the park. nap time is now also accompanied by reading. find something your child enjoys doing with you and fill the void of time that they would normally be breastfeeding with fun activities instead. you will be surprised at how little they miss it.

- buy a new cup. this sounds silly, but it worked for us. we picked up 2 new cups, bpa free of course, that had soft nipple style tops. mackenzie loved them as they feel and kind of look like a boobie. she found it easier to transition from no boob to only milk in her cup now that she had her own "no booby" cup.

- make them proud. we hung a chart on our fridge and each day our daughter went booby free she got a big girl sticker. she loves it and counts her stickers everyday. they forget about this eventually and you don't need to give them a sticker everyday till they are 85, but for the time being we found instilling that sense of pride in their accomplishment is a great reward.