notes from the mommyhood - post traumatic shi* disorder

ok, this is a gross post, but funny, and disgusting and i couldn't help but share it. i need to know that i am not alone. we are starting to potty train, or what i am slowly learning should be called - hell. just when you think life may start to get a bit more normal, your child is talking, sleeping (a bit), has teeth and is eating normally, a slight euphoria hits you, i can handle this, it's gonna be ok, and then wham - enter the POTTY. i hate the potty. we have hardly started the potty training and i already hate the potty. i especially hate that stupid, unintelligent, ridiculously overplayed and over advertised "potty dance" commercial. what the fu*& is that? i'm sorry to go off on a tangent, but that dance is dumb. ok, i said it. moving on.
we started potty training, things have been going good, until the other day. we decided to go the route of letting mackenzie set her own pace. we didn't want to really force her too much, as she isn't even 2 yet. i wanted it to be a relaxing experience for her and she seems keen to learn. we do the training pants during the day and diapers when we go out and at night. i usually ask her in the morning if she would prefer diapers or training pants and she usually wants the training pants. well the other day, it was the diaper she wanted. i should have known.

so we put that diaper on. i was sick and having a very, very rough day and had been counting down the hours/minutes till my husband got home from work, which was late. i was laying on the couch in misery, when i spotted my angel daughter (ya right) out of the corner of my eye crouching in the corner. i then heard that rrrriiippping sound of the velcro coming off. just as i turned to stop her, flop, off came the diaper and out rolled a huge poop. now, not to be too graphic, some fell out of the diaper, and what did my angel baby do, picked it up. she looked at me and in slow motion i yelled "nooooooooo", she then decided it was gross, and stunk and wanted it off her hands. she started flicking that poo all over my light beige carpet. now, i had already thrown up everything in my tummy, thank goodness, or i would have barfed right then and there and the sight of her little legs and bum covered in poop, hands brown with it and my poor, rental carpet covered in it.

my question to you is, what the heck do you do in a situation like this? cry? barf? get drunk? i called my hubby and told him how much he owes me and asked him to bring me home a cookie. i think i was crazed. a cookie? don't ask me why, but in that situation the only thing that would make my disgust disappear was to eat something i hardly ever eat. and you know what, this situation happened a few days ago, and what did i bake today - cookies. i am still recovering. i think i have post traumatic shi* disorder.

any of you out there suffering? let's share our stories - i need to know i am not alone out here.